Contact Nigel, Eva Update and WWE.

PC UPDATE.

Well the PC is still standing. Eva ripped it open and wiggled its RAM and now it seems content to chug along as normal.

EVA UPDATE.

Eva and I went back to the hospital on Thursday as we were told, only to find they weren't expecting us until next week (what we were told last week). On the plus side though, her test results were back. Unfortunately the doctor had no idea what they meant so tried to GOOGLE them.

Needless to say we are none the wiser as to what was/is wrong with her other than it *might* have been the flu.

Gotta love the NHS.

GENERAL UPDATE.

Next week Eva and I will be taking a well deserved break and traveling up to Sheffield for a couple of days to watch the WWE TV tapings. We've got almost front row seats for this Monday's Raw show, This Thursdays ECW and Friday's Smackdown shows. All three shows will be on TV this week, so keep an eye out for us.

To be honest, we can't really afford to spend the money to drive up there, but we've had the tickets for months and its far too late to try and sell them, besides, it's a treat for us and it's not something we do every day. So to hell with it, we're going to have a damn good time.

DOXXVILLE UPDATE.

Books are still selling well and feedback has been very positive. The second novel seems to be even more entertaining than the first and the poetry is going over well with the kiddiewinks.

Nigel seems to be taking his new found fame in good stead and has opened himself up a facebook account here. Friend him to keep up with his daily activities.

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PC RIP?

Now I've never claimed to be a computerist, but I can hold my own with the geeks. I can blog, tweet, facebook and myspace. I can defrag, clean up, scan and de-virus. So for the most part, I know what I'm doing. But this morning all my PC wants to do is make a noise like a chipmunk singing in morse code, I've got nothing.

I can fix most PC problems, but when the thing won't even switch on it leaves me up poo poo creak sans poo poo paddle.

On the bright side, this freed up my time enough to help Eva rearrange the living room some. Not a drastic change, but it exposes the rads a little more - and with winter on the way, that's no bad thing.

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Eva's adventures in Hospitaland.

What a week.

For those of you keeping up with my facebook and twitter feeds, you'll know that Eva was taken in to hospital late Saturday night. She'd been feeling ill for a few days and was putting on her best face as her school time friend Cheryl was down for a night on the razz. Eventually though, she decided to let Cheryl tear the town up herself and stay in bed.

Not long after Cheryl had left, Eva decided that it was time to phone the Doctors on call. Having had Pneumonia a few years ago, she was familiar with the symptoms. The Doctors soon called back and asked us to head to the hospital as quick as week could.

After half of forever in the waiting room, the doctor who saw us seemed to think that it was either a viral form or Meningitis or Menigism. After some poking and prodding, we were moved (Eva, Stuey and I) to a ward full of elderly ladies in CDU. One lady in particular was quite the loony and seemed to insist on getting out of bed to look for her husband, despite it being about midnight and her not wearing much at all.

The poking and prodding continued as they took blood and recording her temperature and pulse rate and a few other things that I didn't quite understand. About 1am they decided that they wouldn't do anything else that night and that Stuey and I should go home. I didn't want to leave Eva, but I'd been convinced that a good night's sleep would do her the world of good.

I arrived back at the hospital early Sunday morning to find that she'd been moved into a private little room away from the crazy lady - who btw in the night had gotten up again and gone for a walk, only to be found on the floor of the syke ward with her head cracked open. So Eva was now in this little private room, but the good night's sleep I'd been promised she'd have never came. The poking and prodding had continued through the night and had included a 6am lumber puncture and bullying by a certain nurse (she was overly rough with injections and mocked Eva when she hurt her, then laughed about it with the nurses out side her room, she also bent back the little thing in her hand that the drip fed into - this is still blistered and bruised today). Being photosensitive and having to have her eyes closed the whole time she never saw which nurse it was, but Eva is certain that if she hears her voice again there will be trouble.

The Sunday was spend with doctors and nurses running in and out every few minutes taking blood and swabs and making notes of her blood pressure, temperature and pulse. She was being fed painkiller and her antibiotics came through a drip. By now she had a wet flannel over her eyes to bring her temperature down and block out the light - something the nurse in the night had refused her. The doctors and nurses we saw that day were brilliant. All very kind and helpful and made us lots of hot drinks, although I drunk most of them.

We were told in the morning that Eva was to have another lumber puncture during the day. Something that she'd had twice before now (one a few years ago and again at 6am) So after a long wait to be taken up stairs for that the porter finally arrived to take us. I was allowed into theatre with Eva to try and keep her calm. She was not looking forward to having the lumber puncture done in the slightest and was very frightened. Once up there, she was anaesthetised and the deed was done.

On our way back down we were visited my Dad and Maggie. Maggie greeted Eva who replied "Asswhhhooogie".
Naturally Maggie was stunned and asked her to repeat it.
"I'maswoooogiejue" she said.
"Pardon?" said Maggie.
"I'm on the woozy juice."

At the end of Sunday, the big wig Doctor swanned in from his day's golfing with the results of all the test to tell us that Eva didn't have any real illness at all and that it was probably only a virus and that she'd get better in a few days. The staff that had actually treated her looked at the Doctor like he was a moron but valued their jobs too much to say so.

So before we knew it, we were shipped out of CDU and over to the arse end of the hospital for some rest. I say rest in the broadest possible terms as the room was beside the air con for the entire hospital. The entire time we were in that room all we could hear was VROOOM VROOOM VROOM VROOOM. Still, come 9pm Eva was asleep - and so was I. She woke me at 10 and sent me home.

Monday was totally different from Sunday's hectic Doctors and Nurses everywhere. None of this taking temperatures and pulses every two hours. No, the method in this ward was to totally forget anyone was in the room and not even pop your head around the doors until early evening. Still, even without her antibiotics (with Dr. Golf stopped) she seemed so much better.

By Tuesday she was worse again, they'd decided to put her back on antibiotics and some hefty painkillers which seemed to knock her out for 2 and a half hours at a time. I must have sat and watched her sleep over 6 hours that day. During one of her brief awake periods a new Doctor came in and said as clear as day that they didn't know what was wrong with Eva at all and by the time they figure it out she will probably be better. You've got to admire his honesty if nothing else. By the time evening came, Eva felt strong enough to leave the room and hobble down for a shower.

When I arrived Wednesday Eva explained to me that after I'd left Tuesday night she'd buzzed for her painkillers at ten to ten but not received them until half past eleven. She was in that much pain that she almost got dressed and walked out. Similarly in the morning she'd waited so long for her pain pills that shortly after getting them she very nearly threw up from the pain. The nurse found her on the floor in the toilet crying. By the time I arrived at 10, all this had gone down and she was fast asleep again.

The bed making nurse woke her up at 11 and said that she'd leave the bedsheets on the side and come back in a few minutes to make the bed. Come 2pm she was nowhere to be seen so Eva climbed back into bed for a rest - she'd been sat in the chair since 11 awaiting to have her bed made. During this time a young female nurse came by for more poking and prodding and the idea of going home was kicked around.

Come about threeish, I slipped out of the room to get someone to come make the bed. It looked like we weren't doing anywhere and I didn't want Eva to have to get back into dirty sweaty sheets. There was some back and forth at the desk until a passing nurse overheard and told us to to worry as we were being allowed to leave.

So I quickstepped back to the room where Eva had starting making the bed and told her the good news, which a nurse then confirmed. Mugs and smiles all round while I packed all our stuff a tried to get hold of Eva's mum to come get us. Eva was still very photosensitive and headachey at this point, but they figured that so long as she came back for a check up on the 29th she'd be fine to rest at home and take the huge bag of pills they'd prepare for her. It took about two hours to get hold of Eva's mum due to problems with the phone. So with everything sorted we were out the door.

Until another nurse comes in to tell us the doctor has changed his mind and we needed to stay another day. We were packed, our ride was coming, we were almost free. This hit hard.

After a few tears and hugs all round, I stormed back to the nurses station to insist that somebody come and sort out the clean sheets. If she was staying, she was at least having the bed made!

Much to her seeming disgust of having to do such a menial task, a nurse was sent to back the bed. She barely picked up the sheets when a new doctor and swarm of nurses buzzed in (as if to save her from this laundry torture) to tell us that if Eva really felt up to it she COULD go home. with the proviso that she take some more pills instead of the tests she was to have the next day and that she come back in for a check up on the 5th of November. Over the moon? We were somewhere near Uranus (but not like that).

As we were finally leaving, the nurse who brought us the doggy bag of pills reminded us of our check up appointment on the 29th. We explained that the Doctor had said the 5th. She reaffirmed us it was the 29th.

Thursday (the 29th) and Eva is still poorly. She managed to force herself out of bed to get head back up the hospital for her check up, only to be told that she was a week early and her appointment wasn't until the 5th.

As of this morning, Eva is still unsteady on her feet, photosensitive and very sore. She still suffers with a headache and now a bruised hand and spine.

It has been a very stressful week for everyone involved. I just hope she gets better soon.

Thank you again for all your well wished through e-mail and text. We both appreciate it very much.

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I'm a poet and I hope you know it.

Hey guys.

A few of you have been asking about my new poetry book and are interested in reading a little before putting your hands in your wallets. Which is understandable in this financial climate. So seeing as I'm not one to disappoint, here is a couple of examples from what you can expect to find.

Icky Rus.

Icky Rus had sticky wings
He used them for flying amongst other things
He’d turn and glide but never fall
Though occasionally he’d get stuck to a wall
For Rus’s wings were a filthy pair
He washed them less than his underwear
And that he only changed once a week
When the smell got so bad he began to reek
Yes Icky Rus was a dirty chap
His friends tried to wash him when he had a nap
But when it came to speed there were few faster
Of the skies Icky was the master
He’d zoom left then zoom right
Zoom up close then zoom out of sight
But then one day at about a quarter to six
When Icky was up to one of his tricks
His friends got together and started to try
To knock poor Icky out of the sky
At first he thought it was fun, just a game
But the sticks and rocks hurt just the same
“Hold on chaps, this is no laugh”
“We’ll stop throwing when you have a bath”
So down he flew feeling like a dud
While his friends bathed Icky in soapy suds
Now Icky Rus is no longer icky
His magnificent wings are no longer sticky
In fact he’s clean and wishes to stay that way
So he makes sure to wash everyday

The forest of Laser Beams.

Two young children set out to venture
On an exciting astounding adventure
They packed their bags with spare clothes and food
Then packed some toys to lighten their mood
So off they set to chase their dreams
Into the forest of laser beams
Now understandably you'll realise
That laser beams aren't good for the eyes
Hence why our two young heroes chose to bring
One of Dr. Fruitloop's magical rings
These special devices are brought to us
By the doctor's genius
So into the forest the children go
Being protected from the wondrous show
The lasers dance and move and wiggle
The children walk through to the middle
They meet a fish with a crooked grin
Who polity asks "How did you get in?"
"It's very simple,” said the first young child
"We came to explore and play in the wild
We saw the forest whilst doing our chores
So we jumped right in through the forest doors"
“Be warned young friends” The fish advised
“Be careful not to trust your eyes.
Things in here can be strange
They’ll look one way and then they’ll change
‘It’s all in the mind’ I once was told
By a bear who turned to gold
Look at me for further proof”
The fish paused to lick his tooth
“You see me now with my crooked teeth
Three days ago I was a plate of beef
A week ago I was a chimpanzee
And before that time I was a giant’s knee”
“My gosh, my word, How absurd
I don’t believe a single word.”
“Is that so?” The fish did smirk
As he watched the forest get to work
There was a whisper and a whisp
And a sound so clear and crisp
Then a scream from the children came
As they fell into the forest’s game
They turned and twisted and twisted and turned
They froze in ice then in fire burned
The trees all laughed and the fish did too
Because they knew their number would increase by two
“Once you entered this forest my dears
You lost all chance of leaving here
Our magic is strong there’s no way out”
“The magical ring!” One child did shout
“That’s right my friend, rub that golden hoop”
And once they did, they summoned Fruitloop
“Good day old chaps what’s the bother here?’
“This fish won’t let us get out of here.”
“Well that won’t do now will it boys?”
The doctor called forth all his toys
Mixers and mashers and all sorts of machines
All of them polished, all of them clean
Gears ground hard and pistons popped
Then all of a sudden, everything stopped
“My good man” Said the doctor “I’ll think you’ll find
That if you fail to retire, I’ll kick your behind”
He’d do it too; the doctor was poised
No harm would befall the two little boys
“Alright I yield” The fish turned fin
“Leave my forest now but never again come in”
And they did just that and headed on home
Leaving the forest and fish alone.

If you like these, or know someone who might, An Anthology of Doxxville Tales Featuring Dwayne Hickenbottom is available here



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All the best.

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Down with the Sickness.

Being ill is never cool, even less so when everyone else around you is ill too. That way there is no one to take care of you - peel grapes and change channel for you when Jeremy Kyle is on and that sort of thing.

It seems that every bugger is ill these days. Eva has been at deaths door since mid September, Conner started the week by tapping on his window and even little Vinnie with him temperature of 103 has been peeping through the keyhole.

I managed to sleep through the entire Monday of this week. Eva left me in bed when she took Vinnie to nursery only to come home at 6pm to find that I literally hadn't moved. Not even to pee.

Even our very own bestest family friend "Big Uncle Stuey" has been struck down with the infamous Swine Flu.


Anyway, in other news.

I'm trying out a snazzy new way to spread the word about my blog and website by using fast followers to hook me up with some more followers to my tweets. So far the program seems to be working great and getting me a tad more traffic.

Svr 2010 came out this week and as expected is damn groovy. I've been a fan of the franchise since the HCTP days on the PS2. I just wish I could stop coughing enough to play the damn thing. Still, Eva is out with the girls tonight (if she's feeling up to it) so hopefully I'll be laying the smack down this evening.

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Monkey strip.

Recently, as I've found myself between projects I've been working on a little "artist first" strip, or as the layman might call it "making it up as I go along".




Where is this strip going? Who is the mysterious hero? Why is there a banana phone?

Honestly, I have no idea. I have no idea if I'll even draw a fourth page, we'll see.

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R.I.P. Captain Lou.

Another wrestling great passes.

I'm sad to hear that WWE Hall of Famer Captain Lou Albano (Louis Vincent Albano) has passed away. He was 76 years old. His cause of death is still unknown at this time. Earlier this week, his family sent out a statement that he was under hospice care. They said he did not have cancer and asked for supporters to respect his privacy.

Captain Lou was a one of a kind personality who had a 40+ year career in the wrestling business as a wrestler and manager. The “manager of champions” guided 15 different tag teams and 4 singles competitors to championship gold. Along with Cyndi Lauper, Albano helped pioneer the Rock ‘n’ Wrestling movement during the 1980s that helped the WWF become a part of mainstream pop culture.



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